WASHINGTON – The international advocacy group Union of Unconcerned Scientists held a press conference Friday in which they placed Global Warming on their list of issues that "really aren't a big deal."

"We really don't get why everyone is making such a big deal about this," said Union President Joel McHeward. "I mean, come on, there's a reason old people go to Florida: it's hot! This really is just not a big deal."

The Union's pronouncement comes just days after the rival group Union of Concerned Scientists' Chairman Dr. Steve Dorr issued his most pressing warning yet, calling climate change "the defining issue of our time." The UUS chief referenced this, but questioned Dorr's eminence.

"I've got a news flash for you, Dr. Dork. You're boring and bald. Go get a toupee," said McHeward at the conference.

McHeward included the hotly-debated issue with prime numbers, safety courses, and "Viewers Like You" in his list of things that are boring and don't matter.

"I'm bored just talking about this. I'm gonna go get a milkshake," added McHeward before leaving.