The Eastern Review

Construction update: gothic erection continues

Construction is progressing on campus with the University’s continued erection of the Danforth University Center and Underground Parking Garage, just east of Simon Hall, where a pedestrian walkway was recently installed.

“Wherever there are men erecting something, it’s often a good idea to clear away bystanders, unless they want to get wet,” said Ralph Jones, Associate Vice Chancellor of facilities for the University. Read on >

News
The Eastern Review publishes funny article
Sources close to the founders of The Eastern Review have confirmed that the internet magazine has finally published something funny. Read on >

- First hand reversal surgery performed
- McDonald's discontinues Hamburglar
- New research sheds light on vagina smell

Local
Goats set free on campus
One dozen she-goats roamed central campus Friday after being released by a disgruntled zoo keeper. University officials responded nonchalantly. Read on >

- Anthrax found in Mallinckrodt falafel, JINES head fingered
- Student gets high, spends five hours moving shelves in Olin B
- Police blotter
- Construction update: gothic erection continues

Positions
I read condensed books, and I'm better than you
You sit on Southwest flight #651 to Baltimore-Washington in row 21's middle seat, slowly plowing through Steinbeck and losing a little bit of your remaining hair every minute of it. Read on >

- A hard cock for everyone's ass
- What if?
- What's the deal with tall people?

Leisure
Amid Vick sentencing, celebrities take time to show support
As hordes of media, concerned fans and angry ingrates await the sentencing of NFL quarterback Michael Vick following his guilty plea to dogfighting, fellow athletes and public personalities have stepped up to the plate, providing us with their views vis-a-vis the morality of dogfighting. Read on >

- The Ex-X-Men
- A layman's guide to pube management

A Humor Magazine Published by Washington University Students

Published: April 27, 2008
See you next fall!

DID YOU KNOW?

The President is the only man allowed to kill the President, but he has to frame the Vice President in order to get away with it.

From The Desk of Mark S. Wrighton
A look at some notes taken by Washington University's chancellor, Mark S. Wrighton.

Letters To The Editor
The Eastern Review responds to some letters sent in from our fans.

Choose Your Own Adventure
You're Jim Spitts in this interactive choose your own adventure. Try to survive!

THE CONTRIBUTORS PAGE

ARCHIVES:
VOLUME I, ISSUE I
VOLUME I, ISSUE II
VOLUME I, ISSUE III
VOLUME I, ISSUE IV
VOLUME I, ISSUE V